Yes, folks. If you didn't know before, God hates a fag. If you're a fag, he hates you too. Probably especially the fag in the video, for such blatant disregard for God's gift of music to the world. Anyway, I'm a little scared of you if you were able to watch it without eventually giggling. And from the web site, we're warned off some of the faggier music out there. For your protection, dear readers, note these unholy bands:
* The Spores (endorse suicide) * Scissor Sisters
* Rufus Wainwright * Merzbau * Ravi Shankar
* Wilco * Bjork * Tech N9ne * Ghostface Killah
* Bobby Conn * Morton Subotnik * Cole Porter
* The String Cheese Incident * Eagles of Death Metal
* Polyphonic Spree * The Faint * Interpol
* Tegan and Sara * Erasure * Le Tigre
* The Gossip * The Doors * Phish * Queen
* The Strokes * Sufjan Stevens * Morrissey(?questionable?)
* The Pet Shop Boys * Metallica * Judas Priest
* The Village People * The Secret Handshake * The Rolling Stones
* David Bowie * Frankie Goes to Hollywood * Man or Astroman
* Richard Cheese * Jay-Z * Depeche Mode * Kansas
* Ani DiFranco * Fischerspooner * John Mayer
* The Indigo Girls * Velvet Underground * Madonna
* Elton John * Barry Manilow * Indigo Girls
* Melissa Etheridge * Eminmen * Nirvana * Boy George*
* The Killers * Lou Reed * Lil' Wayne * Motorhead
* Jill Sobule * Wilson Phillips * DMX * Lisa Loeb
* Dogstar * Thirty Seconds to Mars * Lil' Kim
* kd lang * Frank Sinatra * Hinder * Nickleback
* Justus Kohncke * Bob Mould * Clay Aiken * Arcade Fire
* Bright Eyes * Corinne Bailey Rae * Audioslave
* Red Hot Chili Peppers * Panic at the Disco
* Elton John(really gay)
I absolutely love the fact that Elton John requires a special warning, and that he appears on their list twice. It's fabulous. And poor Jill Sobule...didn't she sing "I Kissed A Girl" or something and not much else? I guess that means, well, you know, even lesbian one-hit wonders cannot escape the scrutiny of the holier than thou. Morrissey (questionable?) is priceless, too.
Also, dude quotes Oscar Wilde on the site:
"Suffering is one very long moment. We cannot divide it by seasons. We can only record its moods, and chronicle their return. With us time itself does not progress. It revolves. It seems to circle round one centre of pain."
--Oscar Wilde (reformed homosexual)
The riotous part of *that* is the citation of Wilde as a "reformed homosexual". The only thing that "reformed" Wilde was his death - due to persecution for his "love that shall not be named." If you're wondering from whence this fountain of straightness bubbles... Thank You, Houston.
PS -
OH! OH! OH! In his "video blog", Mr. Davies - in the cadence you'd expect - thanks Andrew Sullivan (the unrepentant-yet-conservative homosexual) for denouncing YouTube's decision to take down the music video above. I snorted out coffee at the part when he thanked Mr. Sullivan for "getting behind him." Adolescent, perhaps, but you know it's funny...
2 comments:
I knew it was all a joke when I read this, from the Evening Service website:
We live not too far from the chemical plants in Baytown and sometimes being so close to that kind of industry creates intense self-reflection, which is what we are all about.
Fitting, though. Because living near all of those chemical plants would definitely explain the quality of music.
There's also a line in the song that's a bit of a tip off. I can't access the video right now for an exact quite, but it has something to do with there being no back door to heaven.
knock knock knockin' on heaven's (back) door
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